Funniest Quotes

The right words from a screenwriter delivered with the right timing from an actor can produce moments that are both memorable and funny.

Here’s the list of the funniest movie quotes ranked and rated by our visitors.

rated 3.29 out of 5
Finding Nemo

41. I suffer from short term memory loss. It runs in my family… At least I think it does… Where are they?

- Ellen DeGeneres as Dory, in “Finding Nemo”

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rated 3.20 out of 5
Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery

42. Yeah, baby, yeah!

- Mike Myers as Austin Powers, in “Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery”

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rated 3.20 out of 5
Planet of the Apes

43. Get your stinking paws off me, you damned dirty ape.

- Charlton Heston as George Taylor, in “Planet of the Apes”

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rated 3.16 out of 5
Finding Nemo

44. Wow. I wish I could speak whale.

- Ellen DeGeneres as Dory, in “Finding Nemo”

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rated 3.16 out of 5
As Good As It Gets

45. Carol the waitress, Simon the fag.

- Jack Nicholson as Melvin Udall, in “As Good As It Gets”

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rated 3.16 out of 5
Meet the Parents

46. Trust me, Greg, when you start having little Fockers running around, you’ll feel the need for this type of security.

- Robert De Niro as Jack Byrnes, in “Meet the Parents”

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rated 3.16 out of 5
Arsenic and Old Lace

47. Insanity runs in my family. It practically gallops.

- Cary Grant as Mortimer Brewster, in “Arsenic and Old Lace”

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rated 3.15 out of 5
Con-Air

48. Define ‘irony’: a bunch of idiots dancing around on a plane, to a song made famous by a band that died in a plane crash.

- Steve Buscemi as Garland “The Marietta Mangler” Greene, in “Con-Air”

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rated 3.13 out of 5
Karate Kid

49. No good to fight. But if must fight… win!

- Pat Morita as Mr. Miyagi, in “Karate Kid”

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rated 3.13 out of 5
Ace Venture, Pet Detective

50. If I’m not back in five minutes… wait longer!

- Jim Carrey as Ace Ventura, in “Ace Venture, Pet Detective”

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